


The (Class)Room Where It Happens

by evangelistofstars



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: 319, Alternate Universe - Elementary School, Don't Ask Why Jefferson Does Weed, Don't Judge Me, Fucked Up, Gen, I Blame Tumblr, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Don't Even Know, i wrote this instead of doing homework
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 13:42:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9443663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evangelistofstars/pseuds/evangelistofstars
Summary: Alex and his friends are in Mr. Washington's 3rd grade class.Basically a Hamilton AU where everything is the same except they're all like 7 and it's totally hilarious





	1. As Long As He Can Hold A Pen, He's A Threat

The bell rang. Everyone ran into Mr. Washington’s 3rd grade classroom. As usual, Alexander Hamilton got there first. He knew he was the teacher’s favorite, and he liked to suck up to him by always being early. His best friends, John Laurens, Lafayette, and Hercules Mulligan, quickly joined.

“WHAT TIME IS IT? SHOWTIME” John yelled as he took the seat closest to Alex. 

Angelica, Eliza, and Peggy, the Schuyler sisters, all walked in at once, taking three seats next to each other and making a little snapping motion. Their friend Maria Reynolds was not far behind, wearing a beautiful red dress. John Adams came in, and George King, the class bully, with his dramatic entrance, trying to steal away all the attention. 

Once most of the class had arrived, Mr. Washington turned around to face the class.   
“I’m going to take attendance. Alright…….John Adams”  
“Here”  
“Aaron Burr”  
There was a knock on the door.   
“Can someone get that?”  
Alex reluctantly got up and opened the door. As much as he hated Aaron, he didn’t want to risk losing his status as Washington’s favorite. Aaron walked in, glaring at him.  
“You’ve kept me from the room where it happens. FOR THE LAST TIME.”  
Alex snickered quietly to himself. He did this pretty much every day. He couldn’t help it. It was just too good to pass up. Mr. Washington flashed a disappointed look at Alex, and then turned back to face the class.

“Alright. Thomas Jefferson…………..Thomas?”  
He saunters in late as usual, his purple coat trailing behind him “What’d I miss?”

“Alright, King.”  
“I am here!”  
“Alexander Hamilton”  
“HEEREE”  
“Okay…Lafayette”  
“Bonjour!”  
“John. John Laurens”  
“Yo”  
“Charles Lee”  
“Wheeeeee”  
“James Madison……...of course not……...okay…….Mulligan?”  
“Bruh bruh!”  
“Please just say here. Okay. Maria Reynolds”  
“Here”  
“Angelica Schuyler”  
“Werk!”  
“Eliza Schuyler”  
“Here”  
“Samuel Seabury.”  
“Here”   
“Okay. We’re done. Now, the issue on the table…..”  
“AND PEGGY!” The two sisters shout, pointing at their sister who was forgotten.  
“Oh! Right. I’m sorry. Margarita Schuyler.”  
“Here.”

“Okay……….the issue on the table: Multiplication.”

John Laurens raised his hand. “Don’t you mean the issue on the times tables?” He and his friends all burst out into uncontrollable laughter, and Washington rolled his eyes. 

“Anyway………..who wants to write the 5 times tables up on the board”

 

Alex’s hand immediately shot up, and so did Jefferson’s. Oh no. This wouldn’t go well. 

Anyway………..who wants to write the 5 times tables up on the board”

 

Alex’s hand immediately shot up, and so did Jefferson’s. Oh no. This wouldn’t go well. 

“Okay, Alex, go ahead.” Alex smirked. Typical. He was always the favorite. Jefferson scowled at him, and Alex glared a response, getting up to write on the whiteboard.

“5, 10, 15, 20, 25….” and so on, he called out as he wrote it down. He didn’t need to say them out loud, he simply was unable to shut his gosh darn mouth. Returning to his seat, he noticed that his favorite green pen was missing.

“Where’s my…….where’s my pen? It was right here a few minutes ago…..Jefferson did you take my pen?”  
A few snickers from Jefferson in the background.  
“As long as he can hold a pen, he’s a threat, so I took his pen!”  
“GIVE ME BACK MY PEN YOU JERK” he yelled as he attacked Jefferson, trying to pry the pen out of his hands. When he finally managed it out, he looked at it and said  
“Ewwwww I don’t want this pen, Jefferson touched it!”  
The two got in a slap fight for a few minutes until Mr. Washington had to come and break it up.


	2. Looks Like Someone Is Helpless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peggy meets Lafayette and falls TOTALLY in love, which of course causes some teasing from her sisters.

It was finally time for recess. Peggy would normally play with her sisters, but she found herself staring at the new Foreign exchange student, Lafayette. He had been in her class for a few weeks now, and was good friends with Alex, John, and Hercules, but she had never really payed much attention to him. But now she found herself unable to look away.

"Peggy? Peggy are you okay?" said a voice from behind her. It was Angelica.

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh" Peggy said, not really paying attention.

Angelica laughed. Her sister obviously had a crush.

"Peggy, go talk to him. He seems nice"

Peggy still didn't notice Angelica.

She shoved Peggy in front of Lafayette, not letting her just stand there and stare at him.

Peggy blushed, realizing who she was looking up at.   
"Uh....hi"

"Hello....um...Patty, was it?"

She blushed a little. “It's Peggy” she said, correcting him.

“Oh….what can I say? I am not very good with ze names…” he said, walking away. 

“Ooooooooh someone has a crush” Peggy turned around to see Angelica standing behind her.

“I do not!” 

“Oh yeah? Sure you don't!’”

“I was just trying to be nice, okay? There's nothing wrong with trying to make a few friends”

“Whatever, if you say so…...but I still think you like him”

Peggy blushed a little “I do not!”

“I think you doooo” Eliza singsonged behind them

“Where did you come from? And that's pretty hypocritical considering the entire school knows about your crush on Alex.”

“What the heck are you talking about?” Eliza said, blushing faintly

“Don't act innocent, I've seen the way you look at him.”

“I'm not saying anything til you admit that you like Lafayette.”

“I do not!” Peggy yelled, trying to hide her blush

“Come on we all know you do”

“No I don't!”

“Okay, so you don't like anything about him?”

“Well….he's nice I guess, and funny sometimes and pretty cool like the way he always jumps off tables is so awesome and I like the cute way he bounces around and his soft floofy ponytail like I just wanna play with it and I like the way everything sounds in his accent and that sassy way he smiles it's kind of adorable” 

“OHMYGOD YOU DO YOU TOTALLY DO” Angelica and Eliza were both jumping up and down 

“Okay…….so maybe I like him a little…...but who cares it's not like he'd like me back” 

“I wouldn't be so sure…” Angelica singsonged, “you know if you want I can-” she was cut off by Peggy.

“Anyway since I confessed now it's your turn. Eliza….”

“What”

“Come on, just admit it. Everyone but Alex himself knows you like him.” 

Eliza smiled awkwardly “Is it really that obvious?”

“Lize, his name is written all over your notebook” Angelica chimed in.

“Okay fine you got me! And since we're talking about crushes…..Ange? Is there anybody that you like?”

“Ewwwww no no no boys have cooties”

“Cooties. Seriously, Angie. We all know you like Jefferson”

“What the heck? That's even worse! Who told you that?”

“Alex may have mentioned it…”

“Ewwww! That's just one of his silly little rumors. Trust me, I do not like Jefferson. If anything I like…...Alex”

“Oh, yOU WOULDNT DARE! OF ALL THE-” Eliza started to yell, but was cut off by the bell.

They walked into the school cafeteria, only to find it empty and completely destroyed.

“What happened?”

“Oh, another food fight. Where were you guys?” Alex said, apparently not having left.

“Playground. Sister issues, don't ask”

“Alright well we better get back to class.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PEGFAYETTE IS A THING AND Y'ALL CAN FIGHT ME IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT


	3. Why Do You Write Like You're Running Out Of Crayons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The HamilSquad makes the entire class a joke, Alex is an 8 yr old fuckboi, Peggy is in love with Lafayette.

“Alright well we better get back to class.”

The three of them followed him back to the room.

“Aw danget! I can't believe we missed lunch!” Peggy whined, lightly kicking one of the lockers.

When they got to class, everyone was waiting for them.

“Where were you guys?”

The Schuyler sisters didn't say anything, just shrugged and sat down. Great.

Peggy almost fell out of her seat when Lafayette sauntered into class. She couldn't contain herself. He smiled at her, and she tried to smile back, flustered. 

Angelica and Eliza giggled at their sister, who was obviously in love with Lafayette.

Peggy turned around and glared at them. "What?"

"You're so helpless"

"Shut up"

Alex reached across, and put his arm around Eliza.  
"Hey" he said, as seductively as a 3rd grader could possibly be.

Eliza giggled, instantly flustered.   
"Um.....hey"

"JUST GET A ROOM ALREADY!" John shouted from a few seats over.

The class immediately went silent when Mr. Washington walked in the room.  
"The issue on the table: Hamilton. ALEXANDER, GET OFF THE TABLE. CLASS HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET!"

"Sorry" Alex said as he jumped off the table.

"Whooo, nice jump Hammy" said Laurens "I wish I could top that"

"I can do better" Lafayette sneered

"Yeah, we know you can"

"CAN WE GET BACK TO THE LESSON?" asked Mr. Washington.  
He started to teach, but only a few people were paying attention.  
Alex had started yet another war with Jefferson.  
Laurens, Lafayette, and Mulligan were goofing off.  
Maria was doing her makeup (yes, she wears makeup at 8, don't ask)  
Angelica was reading her book.  
Peggy was staring dreamily at Lafayette.  
That left Eliza, Burr, and Charles Lee as the ones that were paying attention. Great. The bell would ring any minute. Now what was he gonna do?

He threw his hands up in frustration, as the bell rang, dismissing the class until Monday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALEX YOU FUCKBOI WILL YOU STOP  
> GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY EVERYTHING'S GONE TO SHIT


	4. Girls Night Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maria invites the Schuyler Sisters over for a sleepover, and, as usual, chaos ensues.

The three sisters stood outside the door to Maria’s place. They had had plenty of sleepovers before, but all of them had been at their house. Angelica knocked on the door, and sure enough, her friend Maria answered.

“Oh hey guys you’re just in time. I made a list of everything we’re doing for the sleepover”

Oh jeez. Another one of Maria’s lists. Did this girl have an ‘off’ button? The list was written in sparkly red pen, so it was kinda hard to read:

Sleepover List List  
-bake chocolate chip cookies  
-watch a movie  
-have a pillow fight  
-give eachother makeovers  
-play truth or dare  
-tell secrets

 

“Wow Maria this looks like a great list” said Eliza. She actually meant it. Peggy smiled nervously. She knew “tell secrets” really meant “talk about guys” and she really didn’t want to talk about her massive crush on Lafayette. Oh well. Sleepovers were sleepovers.

“Okay first thing. Cookies” said Eliza, following Maria and Angelica into the kitchen.

“Whoa your house is so nice” said Peggy, trailing behind her sisters. Maria got out all the ingredients for chocolate chip cookies and put them on the counter. 

“Okay, my mom wrote down the recipe right here” she said, holding the sheet of paper out in front of them.

___________________________________________________________________________

The four of them looked down at the bowl, staring into the batter.

“Okay I’ll add the chocolate chips, and Peggy you can stir” said Maria, handing Peggy a spoon and doling out chips into the mix.

“Yay I love stirring!” Peggy said, and began to mix the bowl with her spoon. After a while she said “I think it’s done”

Maria looked down into the batter to check.  
“Yep” she said, spooning the batter onto the tray in little circles  
“And now they go in the oven” she said as she put them in to bake for an hour.

“Okay” said Eliza “What movie do we wanna watch?”

“OOH FROZEN”

“Yes! I love that movie”

“Okay…..” said Maria, and she put it on.

They sat there and watched the movie, Maria got up to take the cookies out as soon as they dinged, and then brought them back into the living room.

“Aw you missed Let It Go” said Angie.

“Oh….no…..go back!”

They did as she said and went back to Let It Go so she could watch it.

“The snow glows white on the mountain tonight…..” all of them sang in unison. Of course, they all knew it by heart. When the movie finished, all of them went upstairs.

______________________________________________________________________________

“What did you do that for?” asked Maria, gesturing to the pillow by her feet.

“PILLOW FIGHT!” yelled Angie, her sisters laughing behind her.

“Yeah that was next on the list.”

“Well just for that, I’m gonna do THIS!” she whacked her in the face with a pillow.

“Hey!” Eliza said, getting ready to throw.

It went on like this for a while, with all the girls giggling and hitting eachother with pillows, until Maria’s mom told them to keep it down.

“Alright. Makoverrrs! Who wants to go first?”

“Oh I do I do!”

“Okay. Peggy, sit here.”

She did as she was told and sat down, as Maria applied lipstick, blush, and eyeshadow to her face.

“Ugh that tickles”

“Peggyyy, sit still. You’re gonna make me mess up!”

“Awe, sorry.”

“It’s okay, just a little over here…….and we’re done! Who’s next?”

“Me! Me!” Eliza ran up and sat in the chair by Maria.

 

After all the sisters were made up, they giggled respectively.  
“Okay Maria….now it’s our turn to give you a makeover”

“Sure, just don’t mess up my hair.”

The sisters took turns putting makeup on their friend.

“And we’re done. Take a look”

“Wow….you did….pretty good...I guess” she smiled, crossing it off the list.

 

“Can we not play truth or dare?” Peggy whined.

“Why not?” said Angelica, smiling deviously.

“Because. I don’t trust you. Or Maria. You guys always come up with these crazy dares that are mean or scary or embarrasing. Don’t you remember what happened last time?”

“Oh yeah, that was perfect! We got to have a substitute teacher for a week!”

“Yep! It was hilarious. Who should we mess with this time?”

“Eliza I dare you to call Alex and tell him to shut up”

“What? No! I’m not messing with Alex.”

“You have to do it, it’s a dare!”

“Alright………..fine” she reluctantly dialed his number.  
“Okay Peggy…..truth or dare”

Peggy thought for a while. If I pick truth I have to tell them who I like, but I don’t trust Angie and Maria with a dare……

“Ummmmmm...truth” she said nervously.

“Alright who do you have a crush on”

“Um no one right now….no one at all. Why would you say that? Hehehehe” she said, playing with a strand of her hair to try and distract herself.

“Okaaaaaaay…………..”

“You picked truth Peggy, you can’t lie”

“I’m not lying!” 

“Yes you are, you’re hiding the fact that you so have a crush on Lafayette.”

“I do not!” Peggy said, although her blushing contradicted her words.

“OH BUT YOU’RE BLUSHING YOU DO YOU TOTALLY DO!!”

“Fine…..maybe I do…..but it’s not like he’d ever like me back…..”

“I wouldn’t be so sure……you know if you want I can talk to him for you”

“Would you? That would be great”

“Yeah sure, how bout next Monday at recess?”

“Great”

“Well……….since we’re on the topic of crushes……..Eliza?”

She giggled “I think you guys already know”

“Yep…...just wanted to see if you’d say it”

They whispered and giggled all night, until falling asleep at like two or three o clock in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THEY'RE WATCHING FROZEN THE LITTLE DORKS  
> also peggy stop denying it we ALL know you looooooove the baguette


	5. What is That? 319?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jefferson is an 8 yr old stoner, Alex is still a fuckboi, and Madison calls 420 "319".

A new day, and a new week at Hamilton Elementary. Alex had always wondered if the school had been named after him. He wouldn't be surprised if it was, honestly. As he walked into school, he saw Jefferson in the parking lot. He had some kind of blunt in his mouth.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, Jefferson?" he sneered, staring down at him. For once he could actually stare down at him.

"I think it's called.......319" said a voice. It was Madison. He wasn't home sick today. Figures.

"Why is the sky blue?" asked Jefferson. He was obviously high.

"Dumb question, I don't have time for this" said Alex, rolling his eyes.

"Pizza is a circle cut into triangles put in a circular box."

Alex paused for a second. "WAIT THAT'S TRUE!" he laughed

"What are you guys talking about?" said a girl's voice. Alex looked behind him. Eliza. His face lit up.

"Heyyyyy" he said to her.  
Eliza blushed slightly, trying to hide her face from Alex.

"Eliza, do you know why the sky is blue?" asked Jefferson, weirdly bubbly.

"No I don't....Maybe Angelica knows"

"Ask her for me?"

"Sure" she smiled. Just because Alex hated Jefferson, didn't mean she had to as well. 

"Balaga is fun Bolkonsky is crazy Mary is plain Dolokhov is fierce Hélène is a slut  
Anatole is hot Marya is old-school Sonya is good Natasha is young and Andrey isn’t here"

"What?"

"Haven't you ever listened to Great Comet?"

"No, what's that?"

"It's a musical, goddamn it. You people have no taste." Thomas said, sneering, throwing his blunt on the floor and going inside.  
Madison quickly follows after him, struggling to keep up as he's still kind of sick.

Eliza looked at Alex  
"We should go in. Class will be starting soon"

"Yeah" said Alex, smiling at her.

And with that they walked in, Alex smirking at her the whole way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> STOP SMOKING WEED JEFFERSON YOU ARE FUCKING 8 YEARS OLD WTF  
> but at least he knows great comet   
> AND ALEX HOW DO YOU KNOW CURSE WORDS  
> also i had no idea what the name of their school should be so i just went with hamilton elementary cuz why the fuck not.


	6. How Do You Not Get It?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Eliza finally do some shit, Peggy still can't take her eyes off Laf, and Jefferson gets sent to the principal.

Once everyone had settled in the classroom, it seemed like it would be a normal day for once. Right? Wrong.  
Alex looked at Eliza, unable to stop smirking at her. It was quite obvious they liked each other, but the way they expressed that was quite different. Eliza got all nervous and flustered when she was around him. But with Alex, his confidence didn't seem to falter at all. In fact, he was even MORE smooth and flirtatious with her than with anyone else. That was the difference between them, and it seemed like that difference was what brought them together. Eliza looked at him, blushing instantly, and he moved himself closer to her, still smirking. Before she knew it she had his arm around her. He was acting strange, but she liked it, and would do absolutely nothing to stop it. Alex ran his hand through her hair, smirking. 

"You like this?"

Eliza blushed intensely.  
"Um-no...where would you get that idea from?"

"Well you're blushing a lot, and you're not doing anything to stop me, so if I were you I'd guess that you like me."

"Um..."

"Well, do you?"

"I- uh..." Eliza said, unable to meet his eyes. Her cheeks were burning, and she tried to hide her blush. Unsuccessfully. She couldn't hide it. She really, really liked him, and she just couldn't lie. It was obvious. "Uh...yeah, I do"

"I knew it!" He smirked.

"Do you like me?" Eliza asked, a tinge of nervousness in her voice.

Alex knew he didn't have to tell her this. It was so damn obvious with his flirting. He smirked at her, staring into her dark helpless eyes, unable to look away.

"Come on, tell me Alex." she said, rolling her eyes.

Jesus lord in Heaven, how did she not get it?  
"Well, if I didn't like you, would I do this?" he smirked, leaning in and kissing her softly on the lips. Is this what people did when they were in love?

Eliza hesitated for a second, then decided to kiss him back. She loved Alex, granted, she was only 8 and didn't really know what love was. But it felt like she loved him.

"OOOH ALEX AND ELIZA SITTING IN A TREE. K-I-S-S-I-N-G."

Eliza pulled away to find Angelica staring down at her.  
"Um...do you mind?"

"Get a room" said Angelica, rolling her eyes, and walking back to Maria and Peggy.

Eliza scowled, walking away from Alex to join her friends.  
"What'd I miss?" she asked.

"Not much, Peggy won't stop staring at Lafayette" said Angelica

"Of course" said Eliza, rolling her eyes.

"Oh is that who she's staring at? I didn't notice" said Maria, fixing her hair.

"Yeah, she has a major crush on him" Angelica answered, rolling her eyes at Peggy.

"I can see why she would" Maria said, laughing a little.

"Yeah....."

"GUYS HELP JEFFERSON IS DOING 319" said a voice, and the girls turned around to find Alex standing behind them.

"What's 319?" asked Peggy, snapping out of her Lafayette fantasy.

"It's what Madison calls 420" Alex sneered.

"Oh, so you're quoting Madison all of a sudden?" Laurens asked defensively, walking over to join Alex.

"I was doing it to be ironic" he retorted, crossing his arms. "Anyway, HELP!"

"Alright, what can we do?"

"Someone tell Washington!!" he yelled, and Eliza went to do what he told. Thomas was her friend, and she didn't want to do this, but she'd do anything for Alex. She loved him. Meanwhile, Peggy went back to her seat, and found herself once again staring at Lafayette.

"Peg, you're drooling" Maria said, laughing at her friend.

Eliza walked up to Mr. Washington, preparing to tell on Thomas.  
"Come on, this is for Alex, you can do this" she told herself. "You can do this."  
She approached the teacher nervously. She couldn't do this. She was too nice. She ran back to Alex. She'd just have to lie and say she did it.

"Did you tell him?" asked Alex, concerned.

"Y-yes." said Eliza, as convincingly as possible. She was a pretty good liar when she needed to be. She was about to say more when the loud speaker cut her off.

"Thomas Jefferson to the principal's office" said a voice.

Oh snap, she thought. Who told?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALEX IS A SLUT ALEX IS A SLUT LORD HELP HIM  
> oml peggy stop being such a yandere  
> thE SCHUYLER SISTERS ARE SO SASSY ITS FUCKING GOALS  
> ALSO HAMLIZA FINALLY YEET

**Author's Note:**

> this sucks.  
> it sucks.  
> but i hope you like it


End file.
